***

quick life update:

• my tumblr was deleted for reasons unbeknownst to me. it was pretty fucking devastating to lose my entire teenage online scrapbook in one day.
• i finally finally finally put a bookend on the shitty, suffocating, failing relationship i had been in for 3 years. i kept holding onto hope that things would change for the better, but after realizing what a healthy relationship should look like, and talking with some of my closest friends about my feelings, i came to the understanding that things would never be right with him. prolonging things would only make it worse. it sucks to feel worthless and unloved by someone you care a lot about. letting him go was one of the best decisions i've made in recent years. i feel so completely free now -- it's incredible!
• i've started forming really strong friendships and being a better/happier person in general. i feel like i can finally be myself around people without having to worry about being judged. 
• i've also started opening myself up to all the love that's around me. i know it sounds incredibly corny, but it's true! i have one friend in particular who has earned a special place in my heart in the last few weeks. it's a nice feeling to know that somebody has my back in a very selfless way, and will care for me unconditionally. we joke around and cuddle a lot, and talk about music and art and emotions. sometimes we smoke on the roof outside his window. it's all very virgin suicides.
• i got a full time job that i initially hated, but i am learning to be okay with it. a lot of my coworkers are international and very kind. they give me homemade bread and hummus and other treats. my supervisors seem to like me, too. 
• i've been throwing myself back into making art whenever i can. i don't have a lot of time to do all the things i want to do, but i feel like i'm making a lot of personal progress. 
• i went on a date (!!!) to the beautiful crystal springs garden with a boy very near & dear to my heart on friday and i'm going to a party with a trumpet player on saturday, so i'm giddy with anticipation and excitement for all the new experiences being thrown right at me. 

all that being said, here is a quick sketch of dylan that i made the other night in his room:

i made it with a felt tip pen, prismacolor pencils, and metallic markers. i'm hoping to make a full series of drawings of him, as well as drawings of other friends, if they'll let me.

*

experiments in inner space, part one:

hi. it's been a long time. i'm far behind in posting any sort of anything that i've made anywhere on the internet, but it doesn't feel wrong. so many things have changed in such a short period of time, i can't even seem to keep up with myself anymore.

#232

self portraits i took in spring:

hi friends,

just wanted to write a quick little note of apology for the lack of updates here lately. i have been beyond busy, for multiple reasons, including (but not limited to):

1. i've been working as a babysitter for two different families, sitting nearly every single day in order to save up some money because... 
2. i was accepted into portland state university (the one and only university i've ever applied to) and have been bogged down with a giant to-do list that i need to complete asap. 
3. when i haven't been busy babysitting and trying to plan photo shoots, i've been busy planning my summer, getting through all my college stuff, working with two musicians on album artwork ideas, making mood boards, and finishing up on some photos from a wedding i shot in april.

i've also gotten majorly behind in organizing my photos properly, so the first step towards posting anything new here is getting that in order. i'd also like to finish reconstructing my website sometime this decade. balancing and prioritizing are two skills i'm in need of mastering; it's hard for me to keep all facets of my life in order simultaneously. hopefully within the next few weeks i'll be able to get everything together and post a bunch of new stuff here.

love you all and thanks a bunch for your continuous caring!

anna

#231

2.19, seal beach:






2.22, pavicic wedding: